If you’re like me, you probably grew up fantasizing about having a romantic Frenchman sweep you off your feet. But what is dating in Paris actually like? What can an American girl expect when arriving in Paris? And how do you navigate French dating culture? Here are the seven things that you can expect from guys while dating in France.
1. They’re Very Forward
If a Frenchman is interested you, chances are that he will waste zero time in letting you know. Like… zero time.
If you’re going to expect anything from a Frenchman, it should be lot of confidence and flattery off the bat. Most of them are used to dealing with (traditionally) hard-to-read Frenchwoman and have subsequently learned to up their A-Game. Don’t be surprised if immediately upon meeting, you’re overcome by flattery and suggestive comments. C’est normal.
To use an example: I once had a man enter my apartment on a first date and subsequently comment on how you “could easily fit two people” inside of my shower.
He was the most conservative person I dated in France.
2. They Move Quickly.
Perhaps due to their forward nature, any Frenchman who is serious about making you his woman will not waste any time in doing so.
So, sex on the first date? Sure. Calling you his girlfriend after mere hours of meeting? OK. Saying “I love you” after three weeks? Why not? Moving in together after two months? Sounds about right.
All of these things are ones that either happened to me or friends of mine.
Like I said – If he likes you, you’ll know.
3. They’re More Open About Sex.
Americans, compared to many Europeans, are quite conservative about sex.
As a result, most French guys are not worried about when the “right” time to have sex might be or about whether a girl is “coming off too easy.” They simply see sex as a natural and enjoyable part of life.
So when in France, expect your French guys to bring up sex a little bit earlier than you may be used to. If you wanna go for it – Great! Regardless, always make sure that boundaries are being respected and you’re doing everything safely.
4. But Kissing Somebody Can Be a Big Deal.
Despite their almost blase attitude towards sex, French people traditionally see kissing as a bigger deal than Americans. Until very recently, kissing somebody (Perhaps, outside the context of extreme drunkeness) in France generally signified the beginning of a relationship with that person.
This trend has died down with the rise of hookup/casual dating culture, but can still be seen in trace amounts. More than once did I or a friend (mostly drunkenly) kiss a guy and immediately been asked for something way more serious.
5. They’re Probably No More Likely To Cheat Than an American – But It’s Different.
While this topic is complex and will someday warrant a blog post of its own, I couldn’t write an article on dating Frenchmen without dealing with their most notorious stereotype – That of the philanderer.
For obvious reasons (IE: culturally different definitions, underreporting, etc.), infeldity is extremely difficult to study. But after living in France for a year and doing some research, I don’t actually think that the French cheat any more than the Americans.
What is different is the way that they cheat and how.
While Americans tend view cheating as a moral issue, the French do not. As a result, it’s slightly more socially acceptable. Furthermore, when the French do cheat, it tends to be for a much longer period of time and more of an emotional affair. So instead of partaking in secret one-night trysts in hotel rooms, French mistresses can sometimes be seen at the opera alongside their partners.
6. They Don’t Deserve Their Worldwide Reputation.
I apologize to every Frenchman I’ve ever slept with. I truly enjoyed my time with each and every one of you.
Except you, Jerome – Go fuck yourself.
But you all as group do not deserve your reputation as world-class sex masters. Simply put, having “good sex” has more to do with compatibility than nationality – Or anything else, for that matter.
7. They’re Sophisticated and Sauve.
Or at least a lot of them think that they are.
So when you hop off your flight at Charles de Gaulle, have no fear. While France and Paris have a unique dating cuture, these tips should navigate it.
Go out, drink some wine, and have fun. ven if it all ends badly, who doesn’t want have a long list of French ex-lovers?
Thanks so much!
I’ll see you all on Sunday!
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